-Note to Brian-
You say your gonna let me suffer.
You put me in a room of sulfer.
I should have known it from the start.
You now have permission to break my heart.
Seeing you in black,
Seeing you in that,
Seeing you cry was glory to me.
I felt better than you...
but who's to say there better than anyone.
I am so sorry.
I'm sorry for being so disappointing or unable to be what you wanted,
I'm sorry for being alive and for not doing anything right,
I'm sorry for everytime I lied,
I'm sorry you gave me life,
I'm sorry for not being someone to be proud of
and for not showing enough love,
I'm sorry for all the times I couldn't make you smile,
I'm sorry i'm not worth your wile,
I'm sorry for all the times I might have caused you pain,
and for all the things I can't gain,
I'm sorry I'm not stable enough
and that I caused your life to be so rough,
I'm sorry I couldn't make you proud
and all the times I didn't shout out loud,
I'm sorry you couldn't recognize my cries for help
and that you couldn't just tell,
I'm sorry I can't figure out what's wrong with me
and for all the scars you had to see,
I'm sorry that it appears I'm crazy
and for all the imes I was just too lazy,
I'm sorry I couldn't be so nice
and for all the things I did wrong twice,
I'm sorry for all the times I cut myself,
I'm sorry you can't afford to find me help,
I'm sorry I can't be the type of daughter your sisters have
and that i'm not half of that,
I'm sorry for all the things I couldn't give you,
I'm sorry for never being able to say "I love you too"
I'm sorry i'm not as strong as my brother,
but all I ever wanted was a caring mother.
I'm sorry for all my tears
and never telling you my fears,
I'm sorry I can't change who I am
and that I did it again,
I'm sorry my mind is so dark,
I'm sorry if I took it too far,
I'm sorry for all the times I overheard...
"She could never give me the world"
But what i'm sorry for the most is, not a lie,
not being able to hear the excuse you make the day I die.
Your name runs through my head
Each and every day
When I close my eyes
Your face won't go away
Was it love or just a thing
How will I ever know
I only know one thing right now
I don't want you to go
Your kiss is like a paradise
I never will be in
I can only think how great
Our love could have been
I'm begging you not to go
I'm sure I'll die inside
Your love is the one and only thing
That's kept me alive for our time
-Have You Ever-
Have you ever loved someone?
Loved them so much you'd cry if they left?
Did they leave?
Did you cry?
Have you ever wanted something?
Wanted it so badly you'd die if you didn't get it?
Was it kept from you?
Did you die?
Have you ever cared for yourself?
Cared so much you could never hurt yourself?
Did you hurt yourself?
Were you sad?